I love Happy Endings

I have been so sick lately. It was absolutely horrible. I assumed I was about to die, or something else of the similar nature. But, your dramatic bullshit queen is back and better than ever. The first day I was actually able to be seen in public I of course wanted to see Jessica. All she could do was talk about the trip next week and how much fun the three of us were going to have, how I needed to give Alyssa a chance. She even went as far as to say I owed it to her. I was not hearing it.

So, how, you may ask, did I get talked into going? After all, this is the girlfriend of the one who pretty much betrayed me. How did I get stuck in this? He thinks I’m his good friend while his girlfriend believes I’m her friend as well. How did all of that happen? I couldn’t tell you, really.

I told Jessica that I would go, so at this point I can’t really get out of it. Well, let’s be realistic. If I had to pull out, I could. Given the certain circumstances, let’s just hope I don’t kill the silly girl, lose my mind over some idiotic comment she may make. Let’s face it. She’s not exactly the smartest woman I know. No wonder he is with her! It did bother him a great deal that I was smarter than him, which, by the way, is a difficult thing not to be. But, he went and found someone with less sense then he happens to posess. How did he manage such a thing? Whatever you do, don’t answer that question. The answer might have me paralyzed for months.

But, I believe in turning every bad situation into a good one, benefiting myself. Since she believes that we are such good friends I could plan the seed of doubt in Alyssa’s head. Who knows? Maybe by the end of this trip I will have managed to unravel their entire relationship. You never know. But, it very well could be coming to an end already at this point…

Monday night Alyssa and Sid were hugging for about five minutes, and she seemed almost nervous when I approached the two. But, as quickly as it came it left. I acted as if nothing out of the ordinary were going on. I kissed her on both cheeks to settle her nerves. So, at this point she could very well be having an affair with Joey’s close friend. He doesn’t even know it. Oh, his idiotic nature never ceases to amaze me! It almost destroys my soul how blind and simple minded he truly can be!

What would Joey do if things ended? Where would he go? I wonder who on earth he would possibly be able to turn to for comfort and support. He is oh so predictable that it is quite boring. He’d come to me all hurt. Of course I would console his supposed broken heart. I would wait for the first given opportunity. Then I would do exactly what he did to me. This story’s ending has already been written. As boring and predictable as it may be, I do not deny that I love the foreseeable ending. How could I? I always love an ending where I land on top. I believe I am about to completely steal the spotlight from her. Oh, this is too delicious for words. They have yet to be invented, I’d say…

They never wrote about blow jobs in the Bible

Tonight I was having dinner with some friends as usual. Mira happened be there with Sid, her counter part (or who would be her counter part if she could gain his interest). So, of course, they sat with us, seeing as they are acquaintances of ours. I use that word in the loosest sense. Speaking of loose…

Mira has had sex with anyone willing. I’m sure that you have heard the saying that age is just a number? Well, whoever brought those words to life must have had her in mind. I remember this particular time Joey and I were sitting around and smoking a couple of cigarettes. She waltzes up to him, interrupts our conversation wanting to know if she could feel his biceps. As I write this I realize just how ludicrous that entire situation was. I wish I could report to you that this is a joke. But, alas it isn’t. Anyway, let’s get back to the current story at hand before I cause the lot of you to vomit. I would not like to be held responsible for such a terrible thing…

As we were eating Sid was hinting at how she likes to swallow, then they proceeded on to whisper about something. Perhaps Sid has partaken in what many a male has? Who knows? I’ll bet he has. He’s a bit on the desperate side, if you know what I mean. I have heard that desperate times call for desperate measures. As soon as he said those words it took me back to a particular situation of sorts…

A friend or two of mine caught her in front of a church parking lot giving head to someone. What was wrong with the back of the church, one may ask. We could almost deduce that she wanted to get caught. Perhaps she wanted to build up a cliental. Isn’t giving head at a church sacrilegious? She surely must have been breaking some rule against God…

But, low and behold it says absolutely nothing in the bible about fornication in (or pertaining to this situation out of) the house of the lord. People had sex out of wedlock and were severely punished. Also, a King killed someone else’s husband so he could sleep with his wife. But, there is not one passage I have ever read about someone giving out a blow job of sorts. This was not the kind of conversation I wanted to have as I ate. I’m sure anyone could imagine why…

The going ons within the middle of the week

I learned quite the valuable lesson Sunday night. Never allow your best friend to bowl when she is completely plastered. The ball may go against the near by wall instead of the lane itself. Since when do bowling alleys have bars? Have they always? Was it not enough that Rashelle drank at that party in West Hollywood a couple hours earlier? Why did we have to go bowling? Oh, yes. Now I remember. She knew her ex- girlfriend would be there. She wanted to prove to her that she was having a good time on her own. Naturally her ex-girlfriend wasn’t there. We did see some people we know. What was there left to do? I suppose drink, go bowling, and smoke a few cigarettes. I had my red bull, of course.

I simply adore Rashelle above anyone else. I truly do. There is not another soul I’ve come into contact with who understands my dramatic antics so well. It also doesn’t hurt that, like me, she always is up to date with exactly what is going on. Seeing as I was gone for five days, I was most appreciative of this factor. Who wouldn’t be?

Jennifer used to be someone I was very close to. She was almost like a sister to me. I noticed that every time she got into a new relationship she just got a little bit crazier, if you know what I mean. After awhile she just got a little bit too crazy and clingy for my liking. I had to dispose of her before it became a direct reflection upon me. I knew the moment Jennifer and Star hooked up it was going to be the biggest disaster of all. Of course I was right. This relationship turned out to be far more destructive than any of her past ones. Who starts planning their wedding after being together for two weeks? I know. Then there was the fact that Jennifer was only allowed to talk to me at certain times during the day. These were Star’s instructions. I was not going to be put under restrictions. And apparently, neither was anyone else in Jennifer’s life. After awhile Jennifer had no one except her relationship with Star.

It didn’t last forever as Jennifer had hoped it would. Then again, she always believes every relationship is going to. Star went on a cruise of sorts. When she returned she learned that Jennifer had betrayed her. She had slept with someone else. And, apparently, Jennifer is with this other girl now. From what has been told to me this other girl makes Star look like a super model. I must see this girl first hand. I find it rather difficult to believe that anyone could make Star look that way. But, if my information is correct, then what the hell was Jennifer thinking? All I can tell you is that Rashelle better keep me informed…

I’ve continued to keep a low profile lately. But, Jeff calls my insistently wanting to see me. I’m not interested. I don’t understand how I ever could have been. But, seeing as he’s my ex, that’s insinuates that at one time we were dating. He wants to see me this weekend. Too bad. I already have other plans. He’ll live. Or maybe I’ll get lucky and he’ll fall down and die. You never know…

Joey called me this week. Three times to be precise. Two out of the three times I chose not to answer his call. The third time I answered on the last ring and made a quick excuse not to talk to him. Talking to him for those few moments took me back to the days when things were very different between us.

At first when things were over I missed him. I missed being around him anytime I wanted. I missed our late night coffee chats. Something about him made me feel safe from the get go. I missed being able to depend on him. I missed so much about him that I probably could have written pages about it. Then I stopped missing him because he no longer missed me.

I remember that night. I laid awake until dawn wondering why things had changed so drastically. Then I realized that it didn't really matter. They had changed and he had let me go. Nothing in the world would be able to alter this particular factor. It was over with. We couldn't fix what had been broken over time.

When Alyssa came into the picture I had one last chance to save whatever was left and I chose not to. He wanted to see me. I remember him saying how he missed me. I made up an excuse, immediately dismissing him. I wasn’t going to hang on to him any longer, not when somebody else wanted him. And unbenounced to him at that point he wanted her as well. I wasn’t about to made a fool of. Not this time. Not again. Now I realize I don’t want things to be the way they were. We live separate lives that always collide with each other. They don’t have to intertwine, though. I believe that that is just fine by me. He can live his life while I live mine. It could never have worked out. In the words, of my friend Samantha, he will never maintain the same level of fabulous that I do…